Posts

Putting "K" in a text message not only shows that you are an a**h*le, but it also shows you are a lazy fuck who abbreviates a two-letter word.

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Children in the dark cause accidents, accidents in the dark cause children

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If we can grow Marijuana on Farmville, Can we sell it on Mafia War?

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LOL used to mean Laugh Out Loud now it means "I have nothing else to say"

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DOES ANYONE ELSE? 1. Lose there phone after putting it down for a second... 2. Feeling ur phone vibrate when it doesnt.... 3. Up all night on weekdays but fall asleep early on weekends... 4. Feel sad when something bad happens to someone in movies... 5. Laugh when people fall... 6. Need to have the tv on even though ur not watching it.... 7. Ask someone to repeat themselves even though u heard them the first time... 8.Forget how to spell the simplest words.:... 9. Look up when they r thinking.. 10. Add things when ur telling a story to make it funnier... Or is it just me?

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Dear society,......................... Please stop calling Justin Bieber gay. We dont want him either. Sincerely, homosexuals

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********* I Hate When This Happens ************** When you are lying in bed, using your phone. Then all of a sudden, it decides to ninja backflip out of your hands and attacks your face.

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WE ALL HAVE 3 ADDRESSES MEMORIZED... 1. Your own address 2. Your best friends address 3. P Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney. (;

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Teenagers;..... The most misunderstood people on the planet earth and are treated like children but expected to act like adults

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Facebook The Only Book I would Die To Read! :P

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Osama had a son who was weak in Maths so Osama hired a personal tutor for him... Teacher: How will u divide 4 Apples among 5 People..? Son: Kill the extra Man...

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Come Like A Racer,.... Sit Like A Yogi... And...... Go Like A King!! ..... So whats so funny about this?? ..Well this was written in a toilet!!

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Judge : Why Did u shoot ur wife instead of her lover?....... Man : Sir its Easier To Shoot One Woman Once, Than to Shoot One Man every week!

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Sibling Property Rules..... If I like it, its mine........... If im holding it, its mine....... If i can take it from you, its mine....... If i had it a little while ago, its mine...... If im chewing something up, all the pieces are mine... If its mine, it must never appear to be yours anyway..... If it it just looks like mine, its mine....... If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.... If its broken, its yours

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There were three women, a Brunette, a Red Head, and a Blonde. They all worked together at an office. Every day they noticed that their boss left work a little early. So one day they met together and decided that today when the boss left, they would all leave early too. The boss left and so did they. The Brunette went home and straight to bed so could get an early start the next morning. The Red Head went home to get in a quick work out before her dinner date. The Blonde went home and walked into the bedroom. She opens the door slowly and saw her husband in bed with her boss, so she shut the door and left. The next day, the Brunette and the Red Head are talking about going home early again. They ask the Blonde if she wants to leave early again. "No," she says, "yesterday I nearly got caught!"

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Toothbrush: Sometimes i feel Like i Have the worst Job In the World !!!..... Toilet Paper : YEAH RIGHT !

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A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

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